Quin Cheung: Quinspired to shorten the distance between her and God!
My story isn’t one of miraculous, divine intervention and metaphysical conversion. To some, it may appear rather benign, but I hope my story can show how beautifully, faithfully and consistently the Lord has guided my life.
Raised in a Christian home, I can’t deny that I’m a child of blessing. We were a typical first generation middle class Asian family figuring out our lives in Canada. While my family didn’t live a life of luxury, I never had to experience hunger, lack of clothing, persecution, nor physical danger. The worst issues to deal with were mean racist remarks on the playground, typical family dysfunction and normal teenage girl insecurities that probably crept further into my adult life longer than I’d like to admit. But in the scope of the world’s problems, I really had nothing to complain about.
Growing up I was part of many wonderful church communities and friendships that helped foster an authentic relationship with the Lord. However as I grew into adulthood, my relationship with Jesus fluctuated between deep intimacy and walking daily in his presence, to constraining him to the sidelines of my life until I needed his closeness again. As life got busy with career, marriage, and kids, it just seemed easier to keep Jesus as a
backup plan more often than not. It was easier to keep my spirituality “efficient” rather than “intimate” because that would require too much effort and frankly, I was just too busy, exhausted and tired.
It was clear that my husband and kids had become my first priority, and subsequently the biggest idol and stumbling block to surrendering every aspect of my life to the Lord. I recall shortly before my 38th birthday finding a lump in my breast (which thankfully turned out to be harmless), and in that moment thinking should it be cancer, I was glad it was happening to me and not my kids. Understandably, this is a relatable feeling from any parent, but deep down, I knew that my faith wasn’t big enough to love and trust God if something terrible happened to my children.
It was a while later when I witnessed Satan attacking my family, specifically my school aged son. This shook me to my core, and it was no exaggeration to say I was angry with God. I spent many nights on my knees praying over our home, our household, and for my own soul. It had me doubting everything I thought I knew about faith, love and even my own salvation. I remember one day specifically during my daily run, I was praying (more likely complaining) to God all my concerns about my son. Suddenly, I heard so clearly in my heart that it was almost an audible voice that stopped me dead in my tracks “Quin, stop worrying, I’ve got him”. I’m sure anyone who saw me after that moment thought I was completely crazy as I jogged down the street with snot and joyful tears running down my face, all with the biggest smile. I can’t say things were better the next day, but in the years following God intervened again and again - both tiny and big miracles - that I simply couldn’t ignore his direct hand touching our hearts and lives. Through it all, my son found his own personal relationship with the Lord and I’m so thankful.
Today, I still admit to having ebbs and flows in my walk with Jesus, but the distance is smaller and He spends much less time on the sidelines and more time walking with and whispering to my soul. Jesus is the one worthy priority in my life that deserves the first fruits of my time, thoughts, resources and energy. My prayer is that He becomes that and more for you as well.
Matthew 6:19-21 “Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven…For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also”
Quin is a photographer at DqStudios in Calgary and the artist behind www.quinspired.com.
